Truck on

We were sat relaxing at Mikadi Beach last Thursday afternoon when an overland truck jammed full of loud and obnoxious kids pulled in. The group also contained possibly the loudest Irish woman on the face of the Earth who's best mate had one of those Cybil Fawlty "machine gunning a seal" laughs. To say that our hearts sank was a bit of an understatement. We were thinking that we wouldn't be able to stand the evening in the bar in their company, let alone a fortnight squashed into a truck.

We breathed a huge sigh of relief when we found out that they weren't with our truck but a different one. Thankfully when our truck pulled in we were greeted by a really nice bunch of people.

So who's on the truck? In total there's 22 of us including the driver, Gavin, and his assistant/fixer, Summer. There's also 3 Americans (Alan, Mandy and Dan), 2 South Africans (Grant and Sue), 3 Kiwis (Jarred, Amy and Glen), 6 Aussies (Mat, Adam, Annie, V, Sam, and Adriana), 1 Italian/Australian (Mike), 1 Maltese/Australian (Nike) and 2 other Brits (Humza and Gaj - although Gaj does claim to be a Sri Lankan prince!)

After briefly meeting our travelling companions we retired to bed for an early night in preparation for a 5am start the following morning. The first 2 days on the truck were set to be the most difficult. 2 consecutive days of 12 hours on the road in order to cover the 850km to get across Tanzania and into Malawi. When we set off at 5am on Friday morning it felt a little bit like we were a bunch of Albanian refugees trying to escape from Sangate in the back of a lorry.

Part of the drive on that first day was through the Mikumi National Park. With the sides of the truck rolled up we had an excellent view of the wildlife and managed to spot elephants, giraffe, zebra, antelope and monkeys. We then made our way into the mountains to camp for the evening at a place called The Old Farmhouse near Iringa. The camp site was really good and was built around a fantastic Bedouin style tented bar. The only problem was that because of the altitude it was bloomin' freezing. We think it's quite possibly the coldest conditions we've ever camped in. Yes, it was even colder than North Devon.

After a freezing night in the tent we then had the pleasure of another 5am start (Liz is absolutely loving these early mornings) as we headed for Malawi.

Just before the boarder we had an interesting encounter at a filling station with a guy called Mr Cool (we're not sure if it's his real name) who became the unofficial black market money changer for the the truck. By using Mr Cool we managed to change our money over at a rate that was significantly better than the banks and currency exchanges. The only danger now is that we're all sat on a pile of counterfeit Malawi Kwacha.

Once over the boarder we made our way to the village of Chitimba on the shore of Lake Malawi. The lake is absolutely massive, 500km long and nearly 100km wide. Standing on the shore with it's golden yellow sand it feels more like a sea than a lake.

The following day those who were feeling fit (or stupid) enough took a 9 hour hike into the surrounding mountains to visit the Manchewe falls, a 50m high waterfall with a cave behind it. Apparently the local villagers used to use the cave to hide in when the slave traders passed through.

The next morning we hit the road again for the half day drive South down the lake to Kande Beach where we would be staying for 3 nights.

Mikadi Beach

We thought that we were somewhere fairly isolated when we were in Jambiani but we perhaps didn't realise quite how isolated it was until we had been back in Dar es Salaam for a day. It wasn't until the morning of the 30th June, a full 5 days after it had been reported, that we found out Michael Jackson had died! We are probably the last two people in the world to hear the news.

After recovering from the previous days horrors induced by the Zanzibar ferry we had a fairly hectic day at the shops trying to sort out the things we would need for when we joined the overland truck. We'll be camping and although the tents are provided we have to bring our own sleeping gear. We jumped in a taxi and headed off out to find the Tanzanian equivalent of Asda. We ended up having to make a jaunt to Mlimani City Mall which is Dar es Salaams biggest out of town shopping centre. It was just like a trip to Merry Hill, a load of disappointing shops in the back end of nowhere. Thankfully we were able to find our camping essentials and got kitted out with an overpriced air bed, pump and duvet.

We then made our way over to Mikadi Beach, which is a few miles South of Dar, where we had a couple of days before meeting up with our overland truck.

When we checked in at Mikadi Beach we were told that because they were full we had been upgraded from our beach front banda to the honeymoon suite . . . or honeymoon straw hut.

We had plenty of wildlife to keep us company. We had a flock of bats roosting in the porch and a swarm of mosquitos feast on our limbs. The mossies were so bad that we had to "double bag" the bed with 2 mosquito nets.

Despite the mossies the accommodation at Mikdi Beach is the first accommodation that we've had in the whole of Africa that has felt like good value for money. For once we are somewhere that is clean and with good facilities that doesn't cost a fortune.

It is also the first beach we've been to since Torquay where no one has tried to sell us anything. We'd forgotten how relaxing it could be sat on a beach without continually being asked if you would like a massage, drink, ice cream, mango, wood carving, coconut, sarong, t-shirt, pineapple, some henna, some jewelry, some shells or a snorkelling or dolphin watching trip. However; Liz would love a copy of Heat magazine for all the Jacko gossip . . . Where are those bloody beach vendors when you need them!

We're guessing that the only reason why there's no vendors here is because it's too dangerous and even they fear a good mugging. There are warning signs all around the camp.

And just in case you forget when you are on the loo, the back of every toilet door is emblazoned with "WARNING! INSIDE CAMP = SAFE. OUTSIDE CAMP = NOT SAFE". The closest internet cafe is about a two minute walk back out of the camp onto the main road. Even for a walk this short they recommend that you take one of the camp's security guards with you.

Because the Masai are renown as fearsome warriors many of them work as security guards, more often than not dressed in their traditional clothes. Since we arrived in Kenya over a month ago virtually everywhere we've stayed has had Masai security guards. It's now got to the point where it doesn't feel safe unless there's a club wielding Masai within 50 yards!

Furniture removal - Tanzanian style

We saw these guy's when we getting off the ferry at Dar.

It almost makes Pickfords look professional!

Vomit comet

Our return to mainland Tanzania yesterday was a bit of a testing journey.

We left Jambiani at 10am and made the 2 hour trip across Zanzibar in a fairly sensible minibus. That part of the journey went to plan apart from being stopped a total of 5 times by different police patrols for backhanders . . . Er, I mean driver and vehicle documentation checks!

We got back into Stone Town at midday with plenty of time to get the 1pm ferry back to Dar es Salaam. Well it would have been if the bloke in the ticket office could have been bothered to sell us a ticket. However he decided that he couldn't be arsed so we had to buy a ticket from another ferry operator whose boat didn't leave until 4pm. Just the 4 hours to sit and wait with our bags then. Thank god that Mercury's bar is next door to the ferry terminal.

After waiting for three and a half hours we made our way to board the ferry to be met by the World's biggest scrum. Three passenger ferries had docked at virtually the same time and were simultaneously trying to unload and load their passengers and cargo from a single pier. It was absolute pandemonium.

After another hour of waiting, queuing, being pushed, pulled, squashed, squeezed, elbowed, jostled and hit with various pieces of luggage we eventually made it onto the pier just as they pulled the gangplank away from the boat that we were trying to board.

Thankfully we only had to wait another 20 minutes for another boat to dock. This was again followed by more pushing, shoving and using luggage as weaponry in order to try and get on board.

The ferry that we caught was advertised as a fast ferry, and for once they weren't joking. This was a REALLY fast ferry . . . regardless of the fact that the sea was rough. We were going so fast the catamaran felt like it spent more time out of the water than in it. This of course led to the vast majority of the passengers being sick. However; because we were going really fast over a really rough sea they were really sick. Not just a bit sick, but a whole lot sick. The sounds and smells were just horrific.

Liz has sworn never to go on another boat again . . . She was just like Steve Redgrave when he gave that infamous interview as he got out of the boat at the 2000 Olympics after he won his 4th gold medal!

Just as we thought the day couldn't have got any worse . . . It did! There were no rooms left at Jambo Inn which meant that we had to check back into the dirt at Safari Inn down the road. Thankfully our room this time was cleaner than the last one we had (well lets face it, it couldn't have been any dirtier)

After a traumatic days travel we headed off out for dinner to be met by some rather unusual menu items. Monday's special of the day was "Bheja Masala (minced brains of cow cooked in gravy with capsicums, onions, tomato - medium spice)". There were also his n her's deserts on offer; "macho nuts" and "big cups". Stop ye tittering at the back . . . They're ice creams!

Dirty digs in Dar

We'd hoped that by catching the bus from Arusha at 9.15 in the morning we would arrive in Dar es Salaam before it was dark. The journey should take about 9 hours, however; thanks to a few delays, what looked like another police shake down and some bad traffic we didn't arrive until well after sunset.

We hopped in a taxi from the bus depot to make the final 8km of the journey into central Dar. The taxi ride was certainly an experience. The traffic was really heavy so the driver spent the entire journey undertaking, cutting up, pushing in and swerving dangerously across all the lanes available (and quite a few that weren't). At one point he left the road completely and, with his arm on the horn, drove down the footpath sending pedestrians flying in every direction. It was like that scene in the film 'Planes, Trains and Automobiles' where John Candy grows horns and morphs into the devil whilst behind the wheel. God knows how, but we eventually made it into the town centre without being mangled in a traffic accident or punched in the face by an irate road user or pedestrian.

Despite our lunatic driver's best/worst efforts we arrived at our hotel of choice, Jambo Inn, just in time to see the last room go to someone else. It was actually quite a shock to the system to see so many other backpackers/tourists in one place as we had seen so few since we left Bangkok nearly 3 weeks ago.

No problem, or so we thought, as we knew there was another hotel, Safari Inn, just around the corner. Safari Inn turned out to be a bit of a low point in the accommodation stakes. I think we have probably just about got used to it when a room is what would be best described as "a bit basic". However when it's a bit basic, a lot run down and completely filthy, then that's an entirely different matter.

Unfortunately Dar es Salaam is yet another place that is listed as unsafe to be on the streets after dark. In the end we decided it was safer to stay in the dirt of the Safari Inn than to risk being mugged whilst out on the street looking for cleaner accommodation.

The following morning we made a sprightly checkout first thing and managed to get a room back round the corner at Jambo Inn. Although Jambo Inn is still well and truly in the "a bit basic" category, at least it's clean.

Breakfast at Jambo Inn is also a hugely entertaining experience thanks to possibly the worst waiter we've ever encountered anywhere in the world. He could even show that useless lot at Sepilok Jungle Resort a new trick or two. We don't think we've ever seen anyone before who has such a brilliant skill of ignoring customers, he really is something special!

I think that my impression of what Dar es Salaam would be like is largely due to the Roald Dahl autobiography 'Going Solo' which we covered in English literature at school. My recollections from that book are not remotely like Dar es Salaam is today. Either it has changed a lot or Mr Dahl was already on one of his many flights of fantasy! I was imagining white sandy beaches and a view of the Indian Ocean. What you actually get is a port and view of the container ships.

The area where we are staying, Kisutu, is very atmospheric and feels more like somewhere in Arabia or India rather than Africa. The streets are full of Muslim and Indian traders who appear to be selling everything apart from the one item we need for our overland truck journey - a sleeping bag.

Other than shopping and soaking up the atmosphere, there isn't a huge amount to do in Dar. So whilst we wait for our ferry to Zanzibar we've spent a fair bit of our time making the most of the luxury hotels with nice facilities that are open to the public. Last night we had dinner at the Movenpick Royal Palm hotel to see a dance and acrobatics performance from a local troupe. Tonight we're off to the rooftop bar at the Kempinski Kilimanjaro hotel.

Even though the Safari Inn was a bit of a dive they still had standards . . .